Bozo criminal for today comes from Deland, Florida, where the cops were called to the local Walmart on a report of a man getting a little tongue. Upon arrival, they confronted bozo Jason Porter, accusing him of shoplifting $35 worth of beef tongue from the meat counter and slipping it into his pants. He denied the theft and then proceeded to try to remove the tongue from his pants when he thought no one was looking. Obviously $35 worth of tongue is hard to conceal so his efforts were for naught. He’s been charged with theft.