Monthly Archives: December 2023

Bozo criminal for today resides in Arkansas but his problems began when he was trying to pass through security at New York’s LaGuardia airport. Something strange in his carry-on on triggered an alarm from a TSA checkpoint. Upon further inspection, agents found seventeen 9mm bullets hidden inside a diaper. Yep, that diaper was fully loaded. Initially, the man denied knowing the bullets were there, but eventually changed his story to blame his girlfriend. Busted! He’s been charged with unlawful possession of 9mm ammunition.

Bozo criminals for today come from Murietta, California where a bozo team pulled of a heist a a local nail and fastener supply store, getting away with about $600 worth of merchandise. End of story, right? Wrong. It seems one of our bozos dropped her cell phone, with credit cards and ID inside the case, in the store. So she marched right back in to demand that the manager give her the phone back. The quick thinking manager tried to bargain with her, offering to give her the phone in exchange for the return of the merchandise. She responded to that request by slapping him up side the head. She grabbed her phone and made getaway number two. Unfortunately for our bozos surveillance video got a good picture of them and their getaway vehicle. In fact the cops found them, still in their car, along with the stolen merchandise, just a few minutes later. Busted! Charged with robbery and assault.

Bozo criminals quite often come up with some strange requests but this one is a doozy. From Jensen Beach, Florida comes the story of bozo Ariella Marella who was the subject of a search warrant early Tuesday. At her residence, SWAT team members seized cocaine, meth, drug paraphernalia and brass knuckles. Additionally, she was on probation for a 2022 conviction for possession of cocaine, Ecstasy, and marijuana. Quite the fun girl, apparently. But it was when they reached for her backpack that she got the most agitated. “Don’t take my dildo!” she shouted. She’s headed to jail. Whereabouts of the dildo are unknown.