The First Clue Was the Weight Gain

Bozo criminal for today comes from Lawrence Township, Ohio, where the cops were called to the Giant Eagle grocery store with a report of a rather unusual theft. The store’s loss prevention manager received a tip about theft in the cold-cuts department of the deli. Further investigation revealed that an employee had a serious ham and salami addiction. It seems the deli worker had been eating up the store’s profits, to the tune of $9200 worth of stolen deli meat over the last eight years. At a cost of $10 per pound, that’s over 900 pounds of meat, or a third of a pound of meat every single day for eight years. Burp. Police are still trying to decide how to proceed in prosecuting the case.