Put Down That, Uh, Sausage, And Step Away From the Counter

  • 1 min read
Bozo criminal for today comes from Powell, Tennessee, where bozo Jalen Cook wanted a bottle of water. So he headed down to the convenience store to pick one up. Nothing unusual about that, right? Did we mention he walked into the store totally naked? And that he walked out without paying? But he wasn’t done. For reasons known only to the Bozo Mind, he returned to the store and began knocking items off the shelf. He then grabbed sausages off the grill and began throwing them at the cashier. The cops were called and our bozo was stunned and placed under arrest. He’s charged with assault with a meaty weapon.