Honestly, I’ve Been Home Watching Netflix

Bozo criminal for today comes from Troy, Michigan, where the cops were called to a report of a vehicle that had hit a telephone pole. When the police arrived, they found blue car parts scattered around but no sign of the vehicle. Continuing their search, they found a car with extensive front end damage parked in a ditch with an empty beer can in the console and footprints leading to a nearby house. The plot thickens…After discovering the wrecked car was registered to the address of the residence, the cops decided to knock on the door. Our bozo answered, with bloodshot eyes and smelling of alcohol. Nope, he said, haven’t been out, been home all night. And is there anyone else at home? Nope. Can you explain the footprints leading from the car to your house? Well, let me get back to you on that. Busted! Charged with Operating While Intoxicated 3rd Offense, Driving While License Suspended, Leaving the Scene of an Accident and Failure to Report an Accident.