A Giant Seal Is the Real Hero Of This Story

Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Ted Williamson for sending in this story which proves that even “sophisticated” drug smugglers can be bozos. It seems that everything that could possibly go wrong did go wrong for this pair, beginning with when they boarded the yacht “Zero” in Madagascar. While in port, Bozo number one used his phone to take pictures of some whales swimming nearby. About an hour later, the same phone apparently “butt recorded” a conversation of our two bozos taking possession of drugs from another vessel. Oops. But that would only be a problem if they got caught, and here’s how that happened. The yacht was shipwrecked on a reef, which led to our bozos loading their drugs on a lifeboat and making their way to a nearby island. A fisherman found the yacht and the police organized a search party. The cops spotted on man “in a colorful shirt” pop up from behind some bushes and, as they approached, two men attempted to flee. And, as fate would have it, they encountered a giant seal who jumped up and bellowed at them. Thinking their odds were better with the cops than with the seal, our bozos surrendered. And did we mention that the drug dealers had dispatched another boat to rescue our stranded bozos? It ran aground also. In total, 380 kilograms of cocaine, close to 345 kilograms of MDMA or ecstasy and 171.2 kilograms of methylamphetamine were seized. Our hapless bozos and their associates face a maximum sentence of life in prison.