Bozo criminal for today comes from Pinellas County, Florida, where our 57-year-old bozo was brought in by the cops on a warrant charging her with failing to appear in court in conjunction with an alleged theft at a Walmart store. Things were going fine until a full body scan revealed something described as “an anomaly”. Further investigation found what appeared to be a glass crack pipe protruding from the woman’s privates. When it was removed from her body, she immediately stepped on it while saying, “This is not a pipe”, instead claiming that it was some sort of sex toy. She had no explanation for the remnants and “burnt markings” on the pipe. Busted! Charged with introducing contraband into a detention facility and tampering with evidence, both felonies.