If Only It Had a Bigger Gas Tank!

Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Howard Rost for sending in today’s report from Houston, Texas. It seems bozo Mohamed Abu-Shlieba stole a Dodge Challenger Hellcat, one of the fastest production cars ever made, with a top speed of 200 MPH. It was so fast that the cops, and their helicopter, couldn’t keep up. The chase continued down I-10 and, just as the cops thought they had lost him, they spotted the Challenger at the side of the road, apparently out of gas. Our bozo had built up a big enough lead that he could probably have evaded the cops, but, for reasons known only to the bozo mind, he was spotted casually walking out of a wooded area and into the middle of a cow pasture while talking on his cell phone. When he was arrested he offered up the Bozo Excuse of the Week, telling the cops he “let it run out of gas” so they could catch up to him. Bad idea. He’s been sentenced to three years in prison.