That’s What Happens When You Buy Those Cheap Plastic Bags At Dollar Tree

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Bozo criminal for today comes from Macomb Township, Michigan, where police were on a routine patrol through an apartment complex when they came upon some definite bozo activity. Officers observed a Mercedes SUV in the parking lot with headlights and interior lights on. One bozo remained inside the vehicle while bozo number two appeared to be frantically searching for something on the ground. Further investigation revealed that a large amount of pills had been spilled on the pavement and our bozo was trying to scoop them up. A check of said bozo’s backpack found $2000 in cash wrapped in a rubber band and Xanax, Adderall and other opiates. Oh, and did we mention there was additionally a large amount of cash in the driver’s side door and a white powdery substance on the seat? Busted! Charged with possession with intent to distribute.