Monthly Archives: September 2025

Bozo criminal for today comes from Torrance, California, where bozo Mary Ann Mason had a $56,000 a year job with the postal service delivering mail. In her spare time, she used her instagram page to chronicle lavish vacations to Aruba, Tulum, Puerto Rico, Hawaii, Los Cabos and Turks and Caicos. Additionally she posted pictures of shopping sprees to Balenciaga, Dior, Hermes and Louis Vuitton as well as of her tricked out Tesla Cybertruck and a diamond encrusted Rolex watch. And pictures of herself with huge stacks of cash. Well, maybe she’s just really good at managing her budget. Probably not. After reports of more than 100 credit cards being stolen on her route, the post office sprang into action, hiding a camera in her delivery vehicle. Busted! Caught on camera going through mail containing checks and plastic. A search of her home turned up 133 credit and debit cards, 16 U.S. Treasury checks, and 18 stolen gift cards. She won’t be taking any trips for a while, facing charges that could lock her up for 30 years.

Bozo criminal for today comes from St. Petersburg, Florida, where bozo Marsha Mitchell was having a beef with her neighbor, who kept parking his car too close to her yard. So, she politely tried to settle the dispute with him, right? Wrong. Maybe she called the cops to aid in the parking dispute? Nope. Got dressed in a hot dog costume and covered the offending car in toilet paper at 4 o’clock in the afternoon? Yep! The cops placed her under arrest, charged with disorderly conduct and resisting arrest. Police gave no further details as to why she was dressed like a weenie, only saying that she was “intoxicated and refused to cooperate with the investigation.”

Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Glen Snow for sending in today’s report from Aurora, Colorado, where the cops spotted a white Chevy Silverado that matched the description of one used in a recent burglary. The cops also noted that some of the stolen items from the burglary were visible in the bed of the truck, so they gave chase. Guess our bozos hoped to make a clean getaway because instead of flooring it, they pulled over into a drive thru car wash. And to make matters worse, the car wash was was already occupied, giving the cops a chance to box them in from both sides. Busted! Charged with theft and fleeing from the police.

Bozo criminal for today comes from Key West, Florida, where tourists were enjoying a ride on the Conch Tour Train when our disheveled looking bozo approached the driver. He must have been a smooth talker, as he convinced the driver that he used to work for the bus company and wanted a tour of the train. The conversation escalated and before you know it, our bozo had taken the keys from the driver took the bus on a spin around Key West, even making a couple of stops to pick up new passengers. Cops were called and were able to use the GPS on board the bus to track it down. Did we mention that our bozo left his truck running in the parking lot of the depot blasting loud rock music? And that he told the cops he was just celebrating his birthday and had only “borrowed” the train. Sorry, you’re busted! Charged with grand theft, burglary and possession of drug paraphernalia.

Bozo criminal for today comes from Lakeway, Texas, where the local police had set up an undercover stakeout, hoping to catch a car thief known to be operating in the area. The bait was set, a nice unmarked car parked close to where our bozo had nabbed a car before. Like flies to, well, you know, our bozo was quickly drawn to the car. Guess he didn’t notice it was occupied by a cop before he tried to jack it. He tried to flee on foot but was quickly apprehended. Further investigation determined he was already in possession of one stolen car when he tried to steal this one. Busted! Charged with attempted theft of a motor vehicle and possession of a stolen vehicle.