They Served Punch, Too, Just Not the Kind He Wanted

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Bozo criminal for today comes from Longview, Washington, where bozo Robert Franklin was at the county courthouse, scheduled to appear on an indecent exposure charge. As luck would have it, on that very same day, at that very same moment, Michelle Parker was also at the courthouse to help her sister with a legal matter. It just so happened that Michelle had picked up a cake for her daughter’s 9th birthday party, and, since she was afraid if she left the cake in the car with her dog, the pooch would eat it, she brought the cake into the courthouse and sat it on a table near the metal detector. It was apparently a very beautiful cake, covered in purple frosting. So beautiful, that, when our bozo passed through the metal detector, he couldn’t resist and shoved his hand into it and shoved a fistful into his mouth. That’s when mayhem insued. Cake and frosting flew as the table was overturned and deputies sprang into action to restrain our cake thief, resulting in our bozo facing new charges of third degree theft. On a happier note, the local Safeway offered to replace the cake.