Bozo criminal for today comes from Pullman, Washington, where bozo Elijah Russell was smoking meth and, for reasons known only to the bozo mind, decided to start shooting fireworks into the ceiling of his apartment. Not surprisingly, this let to not only his apartment being destroyed, but eight adjoining apartments also being burned and dozens of residents being evacuated. He fled when police arrived, leading them on a high speed chase and finally ended up being boxed in by police cars. The standoff continued until our bozo offered up his ultimatum. He would surrender in exchange for a cheeseburger and Blizzard from Dairy Queen. The cops complied, delivering the goods via a tactical robot. After giving himself up, he was charged with felony arson and eluding. Further details, such as the flavor of the Blizzard, are unavailable.